DISGUISED BLESSINGS

Life is full of lessons; opportunities to gain wisdom. It’s in recognizing the lessons for the disguised blessings they are that we grow.

A few years ago I was banned from Facebook and Instagram. 

There was no warning. I was simply informed that I was no longer allowed on the platforms. I couldn’t for the life of my figure out why. And that bothered me. A lot.

I’d been on those platforms for well over a decade and had built up a growing following. I shared much of the same type of content as I do through my blog. Faith, hope, and love inspired poetry and words of encouragement. 

I also managed the memorial scholarship pages for my niece and my best friend. My niece had died in 2013 from breast cancer and our family had started a nursing scholarship at the local community college in her honor. My best friend was killed in 2017. Immediately following her death, the community set up a scholarship at Florida State University in her honor. 

I lost access to those pages as well. All of my content was simply gone with no means of recovering it. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt.

It may be a coincidence, but the ban came the Monday after Easter in 2021. 

On Easter Sunday I’d shared a poem I’d written about the redeeming blood of Christ. I’d shared many such poems in the past without any complaint or censor. So, I didn’t think twice about sharing that one.

Honestly, despite the ban, I still don’t regret sharing it. 

At any rate, on Monday I was informed without notice or opportunity to discover why that I was simply band.

At first I was angry. I reached out to try to get answers but a reply never came. I literally had no recourse. That was hard to swallow. 

After a while, rather than continuing to dwell on it and sabotaging my peace of mind, I accepted it. 

And moved on.

That was four years ago. Looking back, I realize the disguised blessing it was.

We receive many disguised blessings in our lives. Most of the time we don’t immediately recognize them. We’re too close to the situation and feel the emotion much more than we recognize the lesson.

I spent a tremendous amount of my time on social media. It amazed me just how much!

In addition, when I wasn’t on, I was developing content, tracking analytics, scheduling posts, and promoting my brand. To what end? To gain more followers of course, get more likes, and more recognition.

Without even realizing it, that end goal had become more important than the message itself. Being removed so abruptly instantly stopped that cycle. Now, what was I going to do with all that time?

Like always, when I prayed about it, asking God to show me the way, He did. 

Without the constant pressure to perform, I was able to take a step back. 

The urge to pick up my phone to scroll through posts went away. My productivity increased.

I began reading scripture and journaling more. And, reflecting more readily on where I was in my recovery journey and the lessons I was still learning. 

I began writing more from the heart. Not that my heart wasn’t in it before. But, without the pressure I placed on myself, without the worry about how well the end product would perform, I again felt the freedom and pure joy in simply creating. 

The disguised blessings were much more visible to me without all the noise and clutter that had filled my mind.

When God closes one door, He does open another. 

With God’s help, I was able to go deeper into my healing. I’ve come to fully understand the awesome power of surrender.  

Through faithful surrender, God has removed my fear and doubt. More importantly, He constantly reminds me that He is always working for my good. 

All He requires of me is trust. That I remain faithful and obedient to the path He has set me on. That I listen to His word and fulfill His purpose. “Thy will, not mine be done,” Luke | 22:42. 

These days, when I sit down to write, it’s because God has placed a need on my soul. 

His word inspires me. More often than not, there’s a lesson He wants me to learn. Another step He wants me to take on this journey. 

As I write, He reveals them. I’m aware of His presence and His love. Most importantly, He reveals the disguised blessings. The ones I’d completely miss without Him. 

God is my safe place. My refuge when my soul longs for peace. It’s in His peace that the words come. It’s through the words that the lessons and the disguised blessings are revealed.

Those disguised blessings continue to strengthen me on my recovery journey. And my faith and gratitude inspire me to share them. 

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JN Fenwick ©2204 | mothjournal14