STAYING THE COURSE IS A CHOICE

Recovery takes courage. Staying the course requires dying to ourselves and a whole lot of faith.

This year on my birthday I did a thing. I’d been thinking about it for some time. But, I waited until it felt right. Until I knew, without doubt or fear, that staying the course meant more to me than anything else.

By the grace of God and through His mercy alone, I’ve overcome. 

The journey itself is the greatest gift I’ve ever given myself. Moreover, as I’ve progressed, my determination has only increased. Choosing recovery and staying the course is now part of me. 

I don’t have to think about it. When trials come, I immediately turn to my greatest source of strength and endurance. I turn to God. He’s always right there.

God counsels me through the storms and uplifts me. In doing so, His voice quiets my fears. His light shines through the darkness of doubt and grants me the perseverance to remain firmly planted on this path.

The cage that once held me captive has shattered. 

No longer does it have any hold on me. Freedom came the moment I surrendered. 

All these years later, I’ve only grown stronger. My desire to stay the course has been renewed with every dawn. 

There’s so much peace in knowing that I fell apart in the most destructive way imaginable, but through God’s great love for me, I continue to choose recovery over fear every second of every day.

That’s why I chose this tattoo at this time. Because the lotus blossom symbolizes rising from the muck. It signifies rebirth and perseverance. That’s what we do in recovery. We break free from the cage, rise and soar. But only through faith. The date, of course, is my rebirth day. The day I surrendered.

Perseverance is vital to growing in faith.

God wants us to persevere no matter what happens. Additionally, He wants us to succeed. By staying the course we learn to overcome the obstacles, difficulties, trials, and tribulations that are part of this life. Each time we do, we experience victory in Christ. 

We have two choices when faced with hardship — trust in God and keep our vision on Him or quit and abandon hope.

Staying the course is a choice. 

I will not abandon hope. From now on, every time I look at this reminder, I’ll be renewed. Since March 22, 2018, I have remained firmly on this course. I’ll remain on it for the rest of my life. 

Every day, I choose to surrender. I choose faith and freedom. With God’s help, the choice is absolute. And I’m grateful.

That’s why I finally did it. This ink symbolizes my gratitude and reminds me that by the grace of God, I’m still here.

We are born, every one of us, with a will that is free.

Letting go. 

It’s not easy.

It’s not supposed to be.

But it’s also not the impossible thing we make it out to be.

We’re wired to hold on.

We hold on to our illusions as tightly as we hold on to pain. 

We hold on to resentment.

We hold on to anger.

We hold on to fear. 

We hold on for dear life.

We tighten our grip.

Accept the shackles.

Carry the weight.

And carry the weight.

We suffocate our souls.

Weigh down our hearts.

Punish our bodies.

Bruise our bones.

We hold on so damn tightly.

And trapped in bondage, we come to fear the very thing we need most.

Freedom.

But what if I can assure you that letting go doesn’t mean falling?

What if I tell you that letting go means flying?

Would you let go?

Would you let the shackles fall away?

Would you drop all that senseless weight and soar?

Would you?

Here’s the thing,  a caged bird doesn’t know it’s caged until it’s free. 

And once free, it never seeks that cage again.

Once its wings have touched the sky,

once its song has echoed through the mountains, it’s forever free.

We are that caged bird.

And we don’t recognize our cage either.

Not until we’re free.

Not until we soar.

Not until the mountains hear our song.

Only then do we see our cage for what it is. 

An illusion. 

Created in our minds.

Fed by our fears.

And locked by our own hands.

Freedom doesn’t beg us.

It doesn’t barter with us.

It doesn’t scream its presence into our souls.

No. It simply waits.

Out there.

With the blue sky.

And the warm breeze.

And the endless ocean.

And all the patience in the world.

Because when we finally taste it, freedom knows our cage will shatter.

And the only thing we’ll carry with us from that place

is the knowledge that all along we already knew how to fly.

JN Fenwick (© 2024) | mothjournal14